Via LinkedIn : Did you change your employer or are you starting on new job? This is the right moment. We’ve all been through these situations and always should recall the importance of creating good first impressions. It is the impact of first impressions.
In categorizing people, we all take shortcuts, and first impressions about people often turn into long-term perceptions and reputations — which are good for people who make positive first impressions (the halo effect), but bad for people who make negative first impressions.
Certainly is the early days are when your boss and colleagues form the most lasting impressions about you. This is when they make assessments about your ‘typical’ behavior — the ‘type’ of person you are. If you have any attendance/punctuality issues in the first few days or weeks, you’ve already lost a significant battle — their confidence in you. People use to take you as seriously as you seem to take yourself — and your work.
And in the workplace, during those first few early days where you are meeting everyone — and everyone is meeting you — first impressions about you and your future potential can make a major impact on your future success with the organization.
“You have to realize that first impressions are remembered. Watch what you say and do. Things can come back to haunt you.”
Keep in mind that he first days at a new job is critical for making the right impression. After all, no office needs another toxic co-worker: the know-it-all, the gossip hound, or the death breath guy. Instead, you want to ooze dependability, preparedness, politeness, good grooming and above all, normality. AND there is an important rule to apply, have a good start with your new boss.
Here are some recommended ways to make sure you and your present-day boss start off on the right foot:
- Know your job and have a good track record of performance. This is THE most important way to impress your new boss – just be really good at what you do. Good leaders have a knack for sizing their new teams up within the first few weeks. They will ask around. If you’re good at what you do, they’ll pick up on it, and if you’re not, not much else will matter.
- Learn about your new manager. Do a Google search; look up their LinkedIn profile. Find out about leadership style, or philosophy. Ask questions about interests, hobbies, family, etc… Show an interest in getting to know him/her, and offer information in return. Being vulnerable is the first step to building trust and a relationship. Play it by ear, don’t offer too much too early (TMI), but be prepared to reciprocate.
- Be VERY open to change. Listen. Don’t listen to evaluate, listen for possibilities. Chances are there’s a reason a new manager was brought it, don’t come across as part of the problem. And maybe you are, but show a willingness and ability to adapt and change.Behaviors that are appreciated by most new managers: enthusiasm, optimism, curiosity, initiative, and good judgment. Behaviors that are frowned upon by a new manager: cynicism, whining, finger pointing, skepticism, and acting like a know-it-all.
- Help your new manager learn. Be proactive, anticipate what they need to know and provide it at the appropriate time.
- Clarifying expectations are critical. Find out what your new manager expects from you, and employees in general. Be prepared to talk about what you expect from your manager, in case you’re asked. But only if asked. If you’re not asked, that’s usually not a good sign.
- Watch your manager’s back. Assume you already have a positive and stable working relationship, and act that way. Assume anything you say about your new boss will get back to them or end up on the company intranet front page the next day. Be an ally.
- However…. don’t be a blatant suck-up. What’s the difference? A good leader usually knows the difference between sucking up and basic courtesy and competence.
Via All Business : Tired of bullying in the office?
We all have at least one: the coworker, client, or boss you just can’t stand. They make life difficult, and they may even make you question your sense of self-worth.
Unfortunately, the chances of them going away are next to nil. If the person is just generally annoying and doesn’t have a direct bearing on your work, you may be able to ignore them. But if they bully you and you have to work with them on a daily basis, it’s time to take action.
Use these 10 tips to resolve conflicts in your workplace that arise from problem coworkers.
Tip #1: Take note of “toxic” coworkers
Know how to spot the problem people in your organization. They show a variety of symptoms: Some are serial chatters and won’t let you get a word in edgewise. Others dodge blame. Some fail to turn in work on time, no matter how much leeway you give them, forcing you to pick up the slack. Some may gossip about others behind their backs. And then there’s the toxic coworker who just never has anything nice to say about your work. Toxic coworkers can take many forms, and your first line of defense is to identify them.
Tip #2: Watch out for bad bosses
Whether you like it or not, your manager is in charge. If your boss is easygoing and a joy to work for, that shouldn’t be a problem. Unfortunately, there are far too many people out there who are not easy to work for and are demanding, arrogant, moody, or just plain mean. Sometimes confronting a difficult boss can put your position in jeopardy. But if confrontation is necessary, try not to make the bad boss feel defensive.
Tip #3: Evaluate your circumstances
Your first reaction may be shock at the way you’re being treated. At work, you expect others to act professionally — not an unreasonable request — and it can be difficult to discover coworkers or clients who behave in a childish or hostile way. Take time to let the shock wear off, then try to evaluate what’s going on.
Tip #4: Make your move
If you’re dealing with a problem person at work — especially one who bullies or undermines you personally — you probably need to take action. If you don’t, there’s a good chance the situation will deteriorate even more, not to mention that the stress of dealing with a bully could take its toll on you and your work. You need to let the offending coworker know you’re aware of their behavior and are willing to take it to someone higher in the chain of command if needed.
Tip #5: Take action sooner rather than later
Whatever you decide to do, don’t let it wait. The longer you deal with the toxic situation, the angrier you’ll become. When you finally do take action, you might behave in a way you’ll regret later. It’s better to handle the problem before it really sours, while you’re still emotionally in control.
Tip #6: Maintain your character
No matter how tempting it may be, avoid complaining to others on a regular basis. Otherwise you risk earning a reputation as a whiner, and higher-ups may question why you’re unable to fight your own battles (even if they should be fighting them for you, or at least leading the charge). By constantly complaining, you might be branded as a troublemaker, and you could even be blamed for other office conflicts.
Tip #7: Rise above it
No matter how despicable the person’s behavior may be, keep your cool. There’s a whole range of immature, toxic behavior you may be tempted to try. Avoid trash-talking or getting personal. And if you think those notes taped in the communal kitchen saying, “Wash your own dishes!!! This means YOU!” are annoying, realize that leaving unsigned notes on your coworker’s desk is sinking to a whole new level.
Tip #8: Keep it confidential
Don’t go public with your grievances. More important, don’t engage with the problem person in front of coworkers, your boss, or clients. Keeping your issues with the person private will make it easier to leave the conflict behind you once it’s been resolved.
Tip #9: Approach them first
Take the initiative in repairing your relationship with the toxic coworker. Think positively, and act as if they are as enthusiastic about resolving the conflict as you are. Start the discussion by saying something like, “I may be wrong about this,” or “I apologize for doing anything that might have hurt you.”
Tip #10: Make the most of it
In the end, you may not agree with the problem person. But even if you don’t like them, you can still learn from them. Use your discussion as a way to find out more about their point of view. If possible, comment on something you value in them. It may help them to see you in a more positive light. It’s unlikely you’ll become best friends, but try to use this situation to understand more about where they’re coming from. This will make working with them easier in the future.
Do They Like You?
You may be the smartest person at your company, but if you can’t get along with colleagues, you won’t get far.
Via Forbes : Are you nice to your co-workers? Before you answer, take a moment to think about it. How often do you ask them personal questions before jumping into a request? When was the last time you spoke to the person sitting next to you about anything besides work?
After reading this New York Times article about how bosses don’t have the time to be nice to their employees at work, it got me thinking—maybe, I’m not as nice as I think I am. And by not taking the extra effort to be kind to my co-workers, I could be contributing to a negative atmosphere.
According to the article, “Rudeness and bad behavior have all grown over the last decades, particularly at work…insensitive interactions have a way of whittling away at people’s health, performance and souls.” I know I’m definitely guilty of being so caught up in my work that I sometimes barely acknowledge the conversation someone is trying to have with me—instead, I just nod along, thinking about my to-do list.
But that’s ridiculous. Because being happy at work can be just as important as your salary. And the more friendly you are with the people you see every day, the happier you’ll be.
With that in mind, here are five fast and easy ways to be nicer at work—it’s easier than you think.
Related: The Scientific Reason You Need To Be Nice To Your Colleagues
1. Share A Funny Link
When you come across something online that makes you laugh, you never question sending it over to a friend. So, the next time you come across an article that makes you giggle, send it to a co-worker who you think will appreciate it. Found a perfectly hilarious GIF that sums up the office? Use your company’s internal chat system (if appropriate) to share it with the group.
2. Ask Someone How Their Night Was
Taking the time to start a conversation about someone’s personal life is a simple way to be nice. And no, you don’t have to go too in-depth and start a 30-minute conversation. But starting out with, “How did the event go last night?” or “Did you enjoy having your family in town this weekend?” is an easy way to show someone you care (and that you were listening yesterday).
3. Invite Someone To Grab Lunch With You
I know, I know—you don’t have time to sit down and eat lunch outside the office. But, let’s face it, we all need a break from work and we all must grab lunch at some point. As long as you’re going outside to get something, you might as well ask someone if he or she would like to join. Even if the person doesn’t have time to go to lunch the day you ask, you’ll still make him or her feel special by throwing the invite out there.
4. Pick Up An Extra Coffee
Very rarely do you come across co-workers who refuse a caffeine fix. Whether it’s on your way into the office in the morning or during a quick work break, pick up an extra coffee (or tea, or whatever else your office likes) for someone. Not only will this brighten the person’s day, but if he or she pays it forward, it’ll start a chain of positivity in the office.
Bonus: Caffeine has been known to do wonders for your professional life.
5. Give Someone A Compliment
One of the biggest complaints people have about their jobs is that they feel underappreciated. We’ve all been there, and we all know it’s not a fun place to be—so challenge yourself to pay compliments to your co-workers regularly. Maybe someone did a great job on the latest project proposal, or maybe a co-worker landed an incredible sale. All you have to do is shoot over a quick email that says, “Hey! Just wanted to let you know that your pitch was really creative, and I’m excited to see how the company moves forward with it.” (If you need help coming up with a compliment, check out how to show thanks in any professional situation.)
See, it’s not that hard or time-consuming to be nicer at work. But, in case you need more convincing, know that research has found that being nice to your colleagues reaps more benefits than you may think.
This article was originally published on The Daily Muse.
Kaitlyn Russell is a summer editorial intern at The Muse and also writes for other publications including USA TODAY College, Her Campus, and The Huffington Post.
Via Careerealism : Warning! horrible co-worker ahead! Every work place has one. That absolutely impossible, difficult, nasty, backbiting individual who makes it his/her personal mission in life to belittle everyone else and make their life a living hell.
Usually, people like this are also extremely manipulative and good at managing both HR and their own boss. When you’re forced to work with or for one of these human porcupines, here are some strategies that will help you escape the worst of the pokes.
Understanding The Nature Of Work Bullies
To begin, you need to understand how this person got to this place in the first place. It’s a little bit nature and a little bit nurture. Every once in awhile this personality type is just plain mean through and through. However, usually nasty behavior stems from a deep personal insecurity about themselves or their ability to perform their job.
Maybe they feel they aren’t good enough; maybe they never got an “A” in school; maybe their mom beat them as a child (seriously). For whatever reason, they feel inferior and by making you miserable they are bringing you down, too. They get perverse satisfaction by doing this. It’s a vandal’s mentality. Smashing nice things that belong to others is fun.
How To Deal With A Horrible Co-Worker
If they are truly horrible they also chase much of the competition for their job and vertical promotions away. This only makes them even more horrible because they now see concrete rewards for their bad behavior. Before you know it, all office etiquette is thrown out the window and there is an office monster on the loose.
1. Killing Porcupines With Kindness
The number one best strategy for dealing with a horrible co-worker is to kill them with kindness. For every exasperated sigh, provide a smile. For every accusatory rant and rave, provide a calm understanding response. Always stand your ground but don’t react to their nastiness. After the first or second time you throw kindness in their face, the bad behavior should stop.
Best of all, you will get a euphoric feeling inside, “AHA, I’ve controlled the beast.” This will make it easier and easier to keep your calm when confronted with accusations, back stabbing campaigns and ghastly behavior. Best yet, if they keep it up you will make them look like an utter fool.
2. Physically Remove Yourself Whenever Possible
This doesn’t mean transfer departments, it means being aware of a negative environment and removing yourself from it. You wouldn’t work outside in a snowstorm unless you had to. Why work next to a human tornado? If you have a flexible working environment, it will be easier for you to focus on your job if you aren’t constantly upset and trying to manage the work bully.
There is a lot to say for out of sight, out of mind. Even noise reduction headphones (turned on or off) can do wonders. Make it clear to your boss that you can be found at all times in your new alternate location. Don’t ever give up your territory – just be somewhere else a lot of the time.
3. Don’t Get Mad, Get Even
Whenever emotions take over the brain it is almost impossible to think logically and make good decisions. Realize you need to manage your own responses as much as managing the work bully. An easy way to do this is to lay future fantasy plans about ways to get even with the work bully. With every snide remark you can add another imagined revenge.
In all likelihood, you will never actually follow through on any of your plans, but if you bide your time there may come a point when you can inflict massive and substantial damage to the work bully and seriously undermine their career. Revenge like this is unbelievably sweet. This sounds evil, but think of all the poor future souls you will be protecting.
4. Manage The Tiger, But Never Trust Him/Her
Often the work bully will respond favorably to your kindness and afterwards try to befriend you. No matter how tempting this is (you might actually really come to like them), never trust the Tiger. This is a professional relationship, let it become more and don’t be surprised if you get bitten.
5. Avoid Engaging In Teams Of People Against The Bully
The camaraderie may be nice and the nasty battle-ax deserves it, but this type of behavior is unprofessional and against all normal office etiquette. In addition, bullies are uncommonly good at staving off attacks. Fighting is what they do best. Don’t assume you and your comrades will end up winning the war.
Don’t let a nasty co-worker bring you down. Follow these tips and be the better office mate!
Via LinkedIn : You can’t build a strong professional network if you don’t open up to your colleagues; but doing so is tricky, because revealing the wrong things can have a devastating effect on your career.
Sharing the right aspects of yourself in the right ways is an art form. Disclosures that feel like relationship builders in the moment can wind up as obvious no-nos with hindsight.
The trick is to catch yourself before you cross that line, because once you share something, there is no going back.
TalentSmart has tested more than a million people and found that the upper echelons of top performance are filled with people who are high in emotional intelligence (90% of top performers, to be exact). Emotionally intelligent people are adept at reading others, and this shows them what they should and shouldn’t reveal about themselves at work.
The following list contains the 12 most common things people reveal that send their careers careening in the wrong direction.
1. That They Hate Their Job
The last thing anyone wants to hear at work is someone complaining about how much they hate their job. Doing so labels you as a negative person, who is not a team player. This brings down the morale of the group. Bosses are quick to catch on to naysayers who drag down morale, and they know that there are always enthusiastic replacements waiting just around the corner.
2. That They Think Someone Is Incompetent
There will always be incompetent people in any workplace, and chances are that everyone knows who they are. If you don’t have the power to help them improve or to fire them, then you have nothing to gain by broadcasting their ineptitude. Announcing your colleague’s incompetence comes across as an insecure attempt to make you look better. Your callousness will inevitably come back to haunt you in the form of your coworkers’ negative opinions of you.
3. How Much Money They Make
Your parents may love to hear all about how much you’re pulling in each month, but in the workplace, this only breeds negativity. It’s impossible to allocate salaries with perfect fairness, and revealing yours gives your coworkers a direct measure of comparison. As soon as everyone knows how much you make, everything you do at work is considered against your income. It’s tempting to swap salary figures with a buddy out of curiosity, but the moment you do, you’ll never see each other the same way again.
4. Their Political and Religious Beliefs
People’s political and religious beliefs are too closely tied to their identities to be discussed without incident at work. Disagreeing with someone else’s views can quickly alter their otherwise strong perception of you. Confronting someone’s core values is one of the most insulting things you can do.
Granted, different people treat politics and religion differently, but asserting your values can alienate some people as quickly as it intrigues others. Even bringing up a hot-button world event without asserting a strong opinion can lead to conflict.
People build their lives around their ideals and beliefs, and giving them your two cents is risky. Be willing to listen to others without inputting anything on your end because all it takes is a disapproving look to start a conflict. Political opinions and religious beliefs are so deeply ingrained in people, that challenging their views is more likely to get you judged than to change their mind.
5. What They Do on Facebook
The last thing your boss wants to see when she logs on to her Facebook account is photos of you taking tequila shots in Tijuana. There are just too many ways you can look inappropriate on Facebook and leave a bad impression. It could be what you’re wearing, who you’re with, what you’re doing, or even your friends’ commentary. These are the little things that can cast a shadow of doubt in your boss’s or colleagues’ minds just when they are about to hand you a big assignment or recommend you for a promotion.
It’s too difficult to try to censure yourself on Facebook for your colleagues. Save yourself the trouble, and don’t friend them there. Let LinkedIn be your professional “social” network, and save Facebook for everybody else.
6. What They Do in the Bedroom
Whether your sex life is out of this world or lacking entirely, this information has no place at work. Such comments might get a chuckle from some people, but it makes most uncomfortable, and even offended. Crossing this line will instantly give you a bad reputation.
7. What They Think Someone Else Does in the Bedroom
A good 111% of the people you work with do not want to know that you bet they’re tigers in the sack. There’s no more surefire way to creep someone out than to let them know that thoughts of their love life have entered your brain. Anything from speculating on a colleague’s sexual orientation to making a relatively indirect comment like, “Oh, to be a newlywed again,” plants a permanent seed in the brains of all who hear it that casts you in a negative light.
Your thoughts are your own. Think whatever you feel is right about people; just keep it to yourself.
8. That They’re After Somebody Else’s Job
Announcing your ambitions at work when they are in direct conflict with other people’s interests comes across as selfish and indifferent to those you work with and the company as a whole. Great employees want the whole team to succeed, not just themselves. Regardless of your actual motives (some of us really do just work for the money), announcing your selfish goal will not help you get there.
9. How Wild They Used To Be in College
Your past can say a lot about you. Just because you did something outlandish or stupid 20 years ago doesn’t mean that people will believe you’ve developed impeccable judgment since then. Some behavior that might qualify as just another day in the typical fraternity (binge drinking, minor theft, drunk driving, abusing people or farm animals, and so on) shows everyone you work with that, when push comes to shove, you have poor judgment and don’t know where to draw the line. Many presidents have been elected in spite of their past indiscretions, but unless you have a team of handlers and PR types protecting and spinning your image, you should keep your unsavory past to yourself.
10. How Intoxicated They Like to Get
You might think talking about how inebriated you were over the weekend has no effect on how you’re viewed at work. After all, if you’re a good worker, then you’re a good worker, right? Unfortunately not. Sharing this will not get people to think you’re fun. Instead, they will see you as unpredictable, immature, and lacking in good judgment. Too many people have negative views of drugs and alcohol for you to reveal how much you love to indulge in them.
11. An Offensive Joke
If there’s one thing we can learn from celebrities, it’s to be careful about what you say and whom you say it to. Offensive jokes make other people feel terrible, and they make you look terrible. They also happen to be much less funny than clever jokes.
A joke crosses the line anytime you try to gauge its appropriateness based on how close you are with someone. If there is anyone who would be offended by your joke, you are better off not telling it. You never know whom people know or what experiences they’ve had in life that can lead your joke to tread on subjects that they take very seriously.
12. That They Are Job Hunting
When I was a kid, I told my baseball coach I was quitting in two weeks. For the next two weeks, I found myself riding the bench. It got even worse after those two weeks when I decided to stay, and I became “the kid who doesn’t even want to be here.” I was crushed, but it was my own fault; I told him my decision before it was certain.
The same thing happens when you tell people that you’re job hunting. Once you reveal that you’re planning to leave, you suddenly become a waste of everyone’s time. There’s also the chance that your hunt will be unsuccessful, so it’s best to wait until you’ve found a job before you tell anyone. Otherwise, you will end up riding the bench.
Bringing It All Together
Let me know what you think of this list. Do you disagree with any of these items? Did I miss any? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below, as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Dr. Travis Bradberry is the award-winning co-author of the #1 bestselling book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0, and the cofounder of TalentSmart, the world’s leading provider of emotional intelligence tests and training, serving more than 75% of Fortune 500 companies. His bestselling books have been translated into 25 languages and are available in more than 150 countries. Dr. Bradberry has written for, or been covered by, Newsweek, BusinessWeek, Fortune, Forbes, Fast Company, Inc., USA Today, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, and The Harvard Business Review.